Rethinking Everything When Faith and Reality Don’t Make Sense asks why we believe what we believe and how we got where we are in life. “Going beyond the why question requires reflection. It requires risk and there are no guarantees where we will land.” – Tim Rymel (Release date, 2018)



Going Gay


Going Gay (2014) tells the story of coming to terms with faith, life and sexuality after 25 years as a conservative evangelical Christian minister,  and conversion therapy survivor. “Denying one’s humanity is quite different than denying one’s desires. Denying ourselves the fundamentals of psychological well-being isn’t spiritual, it’s the basis for mental illness.” – Tim Rymel


Everything I Learned About Management I Learned From Having a Kindergartner (2012) is Tim’s first book. With humor and common sense, Tim talks about effective management using authenticity and sincerity in today’s 21st century workplace.

About Tim


Tim Rymel grew up politically, socially, and religiously conservative. A product of his Pentecostal upbringing, he entered the ministry at age 15, but was conflicted between his deeply held convictions and equally ingrained sexual orientation.

In 1990, he sought help through one of the world’s oldest and most renowned conversion therapy ministries at the time, Love in Action. Convinced God had changed him, Tim shared the message of “freedom from homosexuality through Jesus Christ” around the country in churches, colleges, radio and television, working as the outreach director with Love in Action. He married a woman in 1995, and fathered two beautiful daughters.

But his world came crashing down when his wife announced she was divorcing him. For the next six years, in virtual isolation, Tim began to rethink everything he believed to be true. He went back to college earning two more degrees, including a graduate degree in education with a focus study on human thinking, belief and understanding.

He shares his powerful journey in the memoir, Going Gay (2014) in which he describes his seven-year involvement with conversion therapy ministry, and ultimate unlikely transformation from a political, social and religious conservative to a social justice writer and outspoken proponent of higher education.

He is the author of the upcoming book, Rethinking Everything When Faith and Reality Don’t Make Sense (2018), Going Gay (2014), and the business book, Everything I Learned About Management I Learned from Having a Kindergartner (2012). Tim has written dozens of articles and blogs as a contributor to the The Huffington Post and The Good Men Projectwhere he writes on the confluence of religion, politics, sexuality, and belief. He is also a member of the American Psychological Association, APA Division 15 Educational psychology, and the Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transexual Issues.

Tim lives in Northern California with his teenage daughters, his spouse, Abel, their dog, Habib, and a former street cat named Sam.

Hire Tim

Colleges and Higher Education

Tim holds a master’s degree in adult education from Colorado State University, where he researched and studied cognitive thinking and transformative learning. He is a member of the American Psychological Association, APA Division 15 Educational psychology, and the Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transexual Issues.

Education profoundly changed Tim’s life and he is passionate about challenging others to think for themselves about the things that matter to them the most.

Book Tim at multiple functions related to:

  • Religion and LGBT Issues
  • Gender and Sexuality Studies
  • Beliefs, Religion and Politics
  • Love Your Body Week


TimFICECDo you wonder how to navigate the LGBT issue in your church? Or do you just need an inspiring story of survival? Tim was a minister in the conservative church for 25 years, serving in multiple capacities and parachurch ministries. His story is ideal for

      • Opening the conversation about LGBT issues
      • Sharing an inspirational story of authenticity and true transformation.

Corporate Training


As a seasoned change management professional, and author of Everything I Learned About Management I Learned from Having a Kindergartner,  Tim understands the complexities of change. Whether it’s moving an individual or an organization toward a goal, the process is still the same. In addition to his degrees and experience as a training executive, his personal experience of grappling with beliefs and perceptions give him a unique edge and approach. In his corporate class, Tim focuses on how to have tough conversations by communicating differently and getting to the next level.

Key workshop takeaways:

      • Learn how your perception may be getting in the way of progress
      • Discover how humans think with their emotions first – Always!
      • Understand the impact of brain communication
      • Learn to be crystal clear with what you want
      • Find out what unconscious needs may be keeping you back
To request a media kit, inquire about about availability for speaking engagements, or for media inquiries, fill out the form below.

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Resources for Pastors

Gay Christian Network

Founded in 2001, the Gay Christian Network (GCN) is a nonprofit Christian ministry dedicated to building bridges and offering support for those caught in the crossfire of one of today’s most divisive culture wars. The ministry lists a multitude of resources for pastors and churches looking to reach out to LGBT members of their congregation and the community at large.

Jesus and the Gays

Rev. Dr. Brian Baker, of Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, Sacramento, gives Scriptural interpretation to passages in the Bible from which most conservative Christians base their beliefs about homosexuality. Dr. Baker offers a breakdown from a cultural perspective of these most troubling verses for Christian conservatives.

The Reformation Project

Matthew Vines, author ofGod and the Gay Christian, founded The Reformation Project which, “exists to train Christians to support and affirm lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) people. Through building a deep grassroots movement, we strive to create an environment in which Christian leaders will have the freedom to take the next steps toward affirming and including LGBT people in all aspects of church life.”

Canyon Walker Connections

Kathy Baldock, an evangelical Christian since 1984, developed a heart for the LGBT community after befriending a lesbian woman over a two year period. She soon realized that what she had been taught about the LGBT community in church and what she was experiencing through her friendship didn’t add up. Kathy, an engineer major in college, began researching how and why the church came to believe what it does about LGBT people and soon found herself confronting the misconceptions and misinformation in the faith she loves. She is the author of “Walking the Bridgeless Canyon,” which documents the historical, cultural, psychological and scriptural underpinnings of attitudes toward homosexuality in the church.


Before you talk about LGBT issues in your church…there are some things you should know.

Resources for LGBT

LGBT Counselors, Therapists, Centers, and Resources

For those who have experienced life-long shame, depression, and anxiety, either through conversion or reparative therapy, or because of social and religious influence, there are experienced people who can help you walk through the healing process.

Find a Psychologist

Find a Therapist

Find additional Mental Health Resources

Locate your local LGBT Center

Gay Christian Ministries

Grace Rivers

Grace Rivers is a ministry to the LGBT community who have been hurt or suffered in the mainstream church. John Smid, former executive director of ex-gay ministry Love in Action, founded and directs Grace Rivers to tackle the religious issues that have affected the gay community. John shares his story in his book, “Ex’d Out: How I Fired the Shame Committee.”

The Gay Christian

Brandon Wallace, a former Southern Baptist Youth Minister, is the author of Straight-Face: A Memoir of Pain, Doubt, Freedom…and Love, and shares his experiences as a gay Christian through his blog.


Looking for a church? keeps track of churches around the U.S. that are affirming and loving toward the LGBT community.


For LGBT students on Christian campuses, OneSafetyNet offers resources so you are not alone! For campuses that have onsite representations and how to get in touch with them, see the growing list of affiliated groups.

Resources for Parents

Just Because He Breathes

Rob and Linda Robertson share their heart-wrenching story of learning what love really means when you have a gay child. If you see nothing else,you’ll want to watch and listen to their story. 

Freed Hearts Ministries

Mom, Susan Cottrell, talks about loving your LGBT children without giving up your faith. She is the author of several books, including “Mom, I’m Gay,” and True Colors – Celebrating the Truth and Beauty of the Real You.  She writes a regular blog for Patheos, and is a popular speaker at churches, schools and other organizations.


Parents and Friends of Lesbians And Gays offers support for everyone, regardless of beliefs. There are hundreds of chapters around the country. Click on the link above to find one near you.

Resources for Spouses

The Straight Spouse Network
The Straight Spouse Connection

Related articles for women of gay men:

Women, Gay Husbands, and the Evangelical Church
Are Women Partly Responsible for Staying Married to a Gay Man?

Find someone to talk to:
Find a Therapist

Virtual Support Groups and Resources

Straight Spouse Connection
Straight Spouse Network

Books and Resources

My Husband is Gay
Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi?

Conversion Therapy